Bless me? Fuck you.

Okay I have a quick question. How many of you out there say "bless you" when someone sneezes? Raise your hand. I see I see, okay put your hands down. This has got to stop people. Why should someone's involuntary bodily response require a voluntary response from everyone around them? Don't get me wrong, I've been saying bless you for 19 years of my life, simply because my parents taught me it was polite. And I feel like a tool.

See here's why we say "bless you". Waay back in the day when people were far too superstitious, religious, and stupid, they said bless you because it was part of their belief that everytime someone sneezed, their soul expelled from their mouth, thus allowing passage for demons and the like to come inside. Believe it or not, they covered their mouth back then as well, not because they were aware of germs or anything like that, but so they could stop their fucking soul from flying out of their mouth at 600 mph. And of course the obligatory "bless you" was started. And of course we're still keeping the demons at bay in the year 2005. Totally polite.

So I've had it with saying "bless you". And I'm not switching to gezuntheit or salud or any of those cultural variations of the same retarded concept, you're all sneezing to a wall of silence. Because it's such a hassle.

Someone sneezes. Another person is obliged to say "bless you". The sneezer is obliged to say "thank you". Are you counting the syllables with me folks? That's 4 syllables being pissed off into the wind for the sake of some superstitious tradition that should have died along with whichever opium smoking pope started the damn thing in the first place. And imagine if more than one person says "bless you". Take all those people, multiply that by 2, and that's how many syllables are being collectively puked down the drain just because some jackass was allergic to pollen. Then you have the people who say "God bless you". They really take their bless you's seriously. Needless to say, I don't think God's blessings are really necessary just because someone had an itch on their damn nose.

So who's ready to start the revolution? Yeah, you may appear impolite at first. Who cares?. But if you MUST maintain your manners, instead of saying bless you whenever someone sneezes, just say, "excuse me ma'am/sir, I would say bless you but..." and explain everything I just said to them. That should do the trick. So who's ready? Who's ready to shut the fuck up?