My brain is asleep but my fingers keep moving

You people are crazy, I swear. After four days on the road I come back thinking I'll read 20 or so comments wishing me a fair trip but instead, I get a bunch of children using my commentbox to talk out of their collective anuses. How I love you guys. Roughly 400 comments. There are three things I missed far too much on my trip. The first thing was soap, the second one was sleep, but the third thing was you guys. So don't think for a second I was too busy getting wasted to care about yall because the entire time I felt like an egg without a sperm, a sperm without a nut, a nut without a squirrel, a squirrel without any legs, in other words, incomplete.

Hot damn so let me recap. Annalisa is slitting her wrists, some haiku action, TG dedicated some Dave to me, Sex is wondering what I like on my triscuits, Christel ate some stale apple jacks, Jesus says hi, Jake is now officially hooked on crack, Jack isn't holding up any fingers because he was using them to type "Greg how many fingers am I holding up?", Pete is trying to hit on MILFS, Amber doesn't like melted cheese in eggs (as don't I), Annalisa wants to know my favorite curse word (FUCK) and went on about taking a shower, Sandy likes getting high off OTC medicine, is Luke a jew, TG likes pickles, and me and Sex have some serious sexual catching up to do.

That's about 1/40 of it. You crazy kooks.

So we came back a day early. It was unanimous, we were dead fucking tired. We were roughin it so much, taking *Mexican showers in gas station bathrooms, eating flaming hot cheetoes and drinking water for breakfast, sleeping in the car outside a motel 6 to save money, trying to light matches off my grissel cuz there was nowhere to shave. I can only be dirty and "rugged" for so long. If I feel dirty I feel ugly, and I hate being ugly! I don't care if a transvestite hooker scoped me out (that's a story for later), if I don't feel clean I can't feel pretty.

But I knew I would have to rough it out. It was a road trip after all. The plan was to hit a bunch of colleges and stay with people we knew. First we stopped off at Fresno state, then we headed up to Santa Cruz and smoked alot of pot, then we headed to San Francisco, then to Oakland, then to our final destination - Santa Barbera, which deserves a post of its own. Alot of drinking dispersed in between sentences.

I'm too tired to write about anything right now. But as far as the women went, they sure love us boys from LA. I caught a bitching tan and I saw alot of pretty trees. I like trees alot more now than I used to. Okay, off to bed folks.

* A mexican shower is when you only wash your face and armpits.