Dickshunary. Get it? Cuz it's suppose to be dictionary but i spelled it... fuckoff

I've been coming up with these new terms lately. Trying to at least. Lots of them suck but I figure if I keep trying at least one of them will stick and become part of everybody in the continental USA's vernacular. Today I described a beautiful woman as being "edible". That one sucks, gah I suck at this game. That one was more for me though, I've been caught up in this whole fruit/women phase.

I want to be quoted because I may die tomorrow. This is a fact. Yeah you may be living right now but at any given time you may die, and that's just a cold hard fact of life and no heater of yours will ever make it warmer. Have you contemplated your mortality motherfucker?

My way of staring death in the face is to be quoted. Maybe I'll contribute a single word to our vernacular, maybe an etire phrase. I'm hoping on an entire quote, one that is simple in phrasing but large in concept, like a fat woman with a skinny soul. I haven't really thought of anything yet. I have some pretty simple ones like "eat a dick" or "shut your fucking face you king-sized cunt" but those are a bit low-brow in comparison to what I'm shooting for.

Yet I believe that nobody can ever "shoot" for being quoted. Ya can't just go out searching for profundity, it is not a hooker, it does not beckon at a moment's whim; rather it comes with the territory. I personally feel that our most creative moments or glorious insights are sparked, brought fourth on the back of a moment's feather. They are not insipidly contrived like the mad scientist to the Frankenstein, against the grain of nature's flow. Fuck that shit.

I thought of a word to describe when I'm feeling horny. Now, whenever I'm feeling horny as shit I say I'm "puppied" up. I find it fitting because it's a "cuter" way of saying I'm horny, yet at the same time I am nothing more than a hump-happy dog, minus the red dick, so the word is really killing two pigeons with one bbgun. The word is yours though, you can have it. Load it up in your opium pipe and smoke it, dream on it, I don't care.

I have a few more I could give you guys but to be honest, I'd rather go masturbate. No really. I'm gonna go masturbate.